Technology is so capable of using the best mathematicians, programmers and philosophers to save the world from human assault-and-battery, I suppose not being grateful would translate into being crotchety. It won’t be long before manufactured trees are primary carbon eaters and ultra-light baths take the place of a soak – it would save water and wrinkling.
Yes, without technology we wouldn’t have software that shares keystrokes, coffee pots that get to working before we do, and access to secret scrolls from thousands of years ago for our viewing pleasure.
But technology can’t create wisdom, it can only expose us to it.
Which means we still have our place. Even if intelligence spins from being collective and contemplative to being instant and synthetic, it defines humans. We’re original, unpredictable, and hard to herd.
Now, if you can’t find a human to like you, get a dog. Dogs listen intently as long as you gaze at them and speak in paragraphs. Dog trainers dispute this.
A dog understands about the same number of words as a three-year-old human. Ninety or a hundred words. Dogs have a longer attention span than NPR if there’s something in it for them.
Dogs already hear and smell better than we do, by a long shot. Is that exciting or scary? Did you know there are dog bark translators? That’s in case you didn’t understand that your dog is barking because something distressful is going on.
Dog tech is advancing rapidly, and it won’t be long until we can read our dog’s thoughts.
There are UV protective dog sunglasses, activity trackers, and cunning sensors. Cunning sensors sounds like an invasion of privacy or a weird solution to parallel parking.
Following the reasoning of Pavlov, dogs can now use a front paw to start a treadmill, grab a snack, or fill their hydrotherapy pool with temperate water.
Manufacturers will tell us this is improving our dog’s life and ours. Remember when we sent dogs into outer space to make sure it was safe for humans? That went well until the landing.
Dogs can wear a special vest and chew on an attached rope which will call your phone and give you its location and probably a picture of what nasty dog bit it. Maybe this one was really invented so if we get in trouble the dog can dial 911, a necessary feature for a service dog, nevertheless, it seems to take reason away and make us rely solely on technology for our well-being.
Dogs are called man’s best friend. That’s because dogs listen without judgment, wag their tail just because, and are horrible only so you’ll say Knock it Off in your referee voice. They look like proud little outlaws when you do that.
Dogs mess with us, which is somehow more acceptable than being messed with by a human.
Now, isn’t part of our plight on earth to learn? And let’s say we can soon have the technology to own artificial dogs that love being petted, are clean, warm, and let us know when a burglary is imminent. Or a remote-control dog that sweeps and separates our recycling. You in?
The thing is, when humans take the same pride in being overworked as a dog does, we won’t have to examine any of this because we will have outfoxed an engineering invasion.