How to look through a seed catalog
Way before Black Fridays, “Feliz Navidad,” or the Pickle Bowl, seed catalogs are arriving in gardeners’ mailboxes. ‘Tis the season. My seed department already holds enough seeds to plant most of an acre probably, but that’s irrelevant. These are the new catalogs, and the question remains: have I grown everything yet?
I’ve been through this before, so I can offer my experience.
Roger, May June and Alford each received four seed catalogs in their mailboxes today. Alford said, “Hallelujah!” but May June held her joy inside. Roger sent out a group text to his Catalog Committee to convene a special session at 6:30 that very evening. “I’ll provide hot chocolate,” he texted.
May June had a green thumb for no good reason because her excitement about gardening was haphazard at best. She understood color arrangement, however, and her artistry and instinct shone through in how she placed plants in her garden beds.
She thumbed through seed catalogs looking for shapes and colors. She was dreaming of colorful climbing things like Red Malabar spinach, lemon cucumbers, Ozark Purple beans and flowers. Which catalog has an answer? May June did not need pencil or paper because she could remember where to find her favorites in each catalog because her memory was Special-K, especially about page numbers.
Did May June complete an order form for the plants she liked? Sometimes. May June epitomized ephemeral visions vs. what gets planted. Everybody’s different and that’s okay.
Observation for May June: Keep on dreaming. Dreaming is contagious, and one of these days, maybe somebody will do something.
Roger’s committee members clamored in bearing legal pads and thermoses of herbal tea intended to sharpen mental acuity. They had practiced for this day.
Roger spoke up. “Clementine,” he said, “we need a complete inventory of seed stock on hand. If you need help, Jojo can help because he’s writing the order and he can’t do nothing yet. Me and Ellen Jane will look through these two catalogs. Ed, you and Martina can look over these two glossy catalogs, probably with mostly hybrid seeds. We usually don’t like hybrids but see what you can find. Keep good notes, and Clementine, we need that inventory soon, and count the beans first.
“Ellen Jane, you get started. I’ll go sharpen the pencils.”
Not only did Clementine prepare the inventory (54 packets total plus some beans in jars), she analyzed inventory versus planting times and charted the results on a calendar. Don’t want to be short on turnip seeds in the month of May. Jojo forwarded inventory results to the catalog crews, and Martina thereby narrowed the radish request on her order from four packets to three. Ed shrugged and nodded. He was thinking about melons. Roger, who had consumed too much hot chocolate, double-checked prices and sweated about the ROI.
After two hours and fifteen minutes, Roger’s group had completed two orders totaling $49.75. They agreed to meet again in August if necessary, and they went home smiling. The room smelled like heavy labor.
Question for Roger: If Jojo were absent, could your team change a light bulb?
Alford poured a half-glass of cabernet and cleared his desk. Seed catalogs to Alford were like cellos to Yo Yo Ma. Reading descriptions and stories about amaranth and artichokes brought back memories. He moseyed studiously and intently from page to page through the new catalogs, compiling lists with page number, item number, item description and price for all his new favorites. This required two half-glass refills and a music break, and his final list was colorful, out of the ordinary and half-exotic. “An even older variety of beet!” Alford exclaimed. “I’ll be Cro-Magnon!”
Word to Alford: “Yeah! Beets!”
Seed catalogs allow a gardener a chance to be fanciful, practical, historical, scientific and oneself. What seeds you order shows your personality.