It’s been said that grief is the twin of great love. Both can stop life in its tracks and take it in a whole new direction. But while love opens new vistas full of bright promise and direction, grief can blot it all out; obscuring direction and purpose for those who mourn.
The trick to getting back to love of life is navigating the grief. This is where programs available in our area, such as GriefShare, help those mourning the loss of a loved one by offering a safe place for them to talk with others who understand what they’re feeling. In addition to the catharsis of sharing, the program provides video teaching/counseling at each session as well as take-home work such as journaling to be completed daily.
And it works.
“I came to GriefShare a hot mess,” group member Pat Mahan said. In 2016 she lost the husband she had been caretaking, and spent the next six years, as she describes it, “full of anger, crying all the time, and feeling lonely and bitter from my losses and regrets. I was exhausted.”
Pat moved to the area a year ago and joined the GriefShare group at First Christian Church in Eureka Springs in January. She decided to tell part of her story publicly to encourage others suffering loss of a loved one not to wait like she did before getting the help the program offers.
“Life still goes on, but you lose joy, ambition and more because of loneliness,” Pat explained. “You can get on with life, but grief is a joy robber.
“Once I started the program, I slowly saw changes in me. I realized I wasn’t alone, that everyone in our group suffered from these same feelings. I watched as others found relief, as I did.
“I’ve learned that there are sometimes losses we’ve never taken the time to grieve because life happens, and we have to move on and deal with it. We’re peeling back those layers of grief and acknowledging them. Now we don’t wallow in self-pity because we’re not quite so vulnerable.
“Today I’m an advocate for this program. I highly recommend to those still suffering that they not wait so long to find answers. GriefShare has helped me repurpose my life and I was able to reinvent myself. I was able to do that because of learning how to navigate the grief. I’m an artist and I had let my creativity go. But now I have just started painting again. I’ll be out there with the Plein Air painters this year!
“I don’t want to die angry and bitter. I think there’s still a lot of joy to be had in life, and I’m aiming to find it. Our job now is to move forward and live, and to move forward with the joy of having loved deeply.”
The ongoing GriefShare program at First Christian Church on Passion Play Road can be joined at any time. The group meets Sundays, 1 – 3 p.m. Contact program facilitator Roberta Smith (402) 651-7269 or manna4life@cox.net. Sessions include a video, group discussion and daily homework.
GriefShare is a national organization. To find a group near you, go to griefshare.org/find a group.