Independent Editorial: Trumpelstiltskin

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We’ve seen a few presidential elections in our time, but nothing like this. Although it’s impossible to capture in one word, “incredulous” nonetheless comes to mind; or better yet, “disturbing.”

We were recently reminded of an old fairy tale while mentally spinning between “that didn’t just happen” to “it happened but of course it will never fly” to “it flew?” to “it not only flew but it landed and people seem to be okay with it” and back to “okay, that didn’t just happen.”

For some reason Rumpelstiltskin came to mind. As the story goes, a miller lies to the king about his daughter being able to spin straw into gold. The king locks the girl in a room full of straw and a spinning wheel and threatens life in the dungeon if the straw doesn’t become gold by morning. When all hope is lost, a creature pops up in the room and says he’ll spin the straw into gold in exchange for a piece of jewelry. This goes on for three nights in larger rooms of straw until there is nothing left to pay the creature with.

If she can fill one last room with gold the king will marry her, otherwise she’ll be beheaded. The creature appears and begins to spin the straw anyway, saying she can pay him later and he’ll name his price when the job is finished. The price turns out to be her firstborn. The horrified girl protests, and Rumpel tells her if she can guess his name the deal can be broken.

In the end, she sends a spy who follows him and hears him mention his name, Rumpelstiltskin. Long story longer, when he comes to claim the child, the girl reveals his name and he becomes so angry he tears himself in half. (Ah, those Grimm Brothers sure know how to send a kid off to sweet dreams.)

So here we are with a country full of straw nobody seems to know what to do with and a presidential candidate who says he can spin it into gold if we just pay his price. It’s clearly magic because no plan has been laid as to how these promises are to be made a reality.

But that’s television for you. Unfortunately, some good folks have this “reality show” confused with real life. After all, Mr. Trump has been in their living rooms via The Apprentice since 2004 so they “know” him. Plus, networks have saved a ton of money running so many expertly staged “reality” shows over the years that much of the public now believe that’s normal behavior in public.

A dismaying remark the newsertainment cable networks have stressed over and over again is that this or that supporter is voting for Trump “because he says what he thinks” – as if this is some high caliber benchmark for the leader of a country. Really? We don’t even like being in public with friends without filters, let alone having a president without filters. Whatever happened to the value of living in polite society?

Oh, right. TV.

The Apprentice started out with regular people in competition for a “job” with the Trump organization. They were given a series of tasks each week and had to report to the boardroom before Trump, seated above them like a judge, where someone was “fired” each week until there were only two left. At that point each candidate had to stage a big event for charity and the one who brought in the most money was the winner.

So, when Trump announced recently he would debate Bernie Sanders for $10 million for charity, something sounded familiar. Looking back at the campaign, it suddenly occurred to us he was running it like a season of The Apprentice.

In its first season the show had 20 million viewers. The tasks were fun and the competition interesting, but the show eventually devolved into arguing, backbiting and unpleasantness between the teams and contestants. Even though producers began casting only celebrities in 2007, the viewership declined until by 2015 there were only four million viewers; nonetheless Trump claimed it was “the number one show on television.”

Someone’s reality check bounced.

And as far as the people Trump has said in debates and repeatedly on his show that he doesn’t like: losers, weak people, poor people (it’s their own fault) the “little” people… well, it’s our guess if Trumpelstiltskin does get the chance to spin gold as promised, it won’t be for us. Most of those “little people” so excited to vote for a reality TV star just because he says what he thinks will never be able to afford a stay in any of his hotels, nor will they be invited.

Some interesting insights can be gleaned by Googling The Washington Post’s story, “Donald Trump’s ‘Apprentice’ may never end: The odd story behind the reality show that will not be stopped,” and a story by Matt Thomas on Fusion.net titled “What I learned about Donald Trump from binge-watching The Apprentice.”

So much for the Republican side. On the Democrat’s side, it is disheartening to hear so many people say if their candidate isn’t the nominee then they won’t vote at all. We’re not telling you whom to vote for, just to vote.

And be careful to whom you promise your firstborn.

CD White