Hall Closets

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Fresh off an off week, we were primed for kickoff — fans and players alike. From Dickson Street to Airport Road, you could feel the love.

The unseasonably dry air over in Fayettenam was filled with revelry on Saturday as tailgates were dropped, grills were lit and dranks were poured. Earlier that morn a water main had blown beneath the busiest gameday intersection in town creating a deep and wide hole causing a citywide traffic jam that only intensified the chaos.

Back over in Carroll County the dart barn crackled with the electricity of a fanbase cooped up too long and hanging on a two-week-old dub. Those of us guilty of overindulgence in the cardinal-colored Kool Aid had visions of another upset dancing in our domes (no, not you, CBall), proving once and forever that a solid fortnight on the Red Drank is seven daze too many.

Indeed, it had been quite a while since Arkansas football fans tasted the extra-sweet, top-shelf elixirs the SEC offers, and it showed. I was as guilty as anyone of continually nipping off that dusty bottle and shoulda known better. Come kickoff, my expectations were as inflated as my blood sugar level.

But after 8th-ranked LSU scored on the opening drive, it became crystal clear that the fix was in and woe is us – same as it ever was.

Top teams are capable of hauling in piles of cash over the course of a successful season; and therefore, conferences urge officials to protect those with better records. This formula – the rich getting richer – was on display in spades over the weekend, and allowed LSU to completely dismantle the Hogs, 34-10 in a game that shoulda been closer.

This crookery first reared its ugly head back in the daze of the SWC, when the Razorbacks were regularly hosed by the refs. Eventually, it became something that we, as fans, were forced to choke down and learn to accept; while thankfully, the team found ways to overcome the constant underhandedness. Then wouldn’t you know it – that nasty cloud followed the U of A outta the old league and into the new one and haunts us, still.

Sadly, I can count on far too many fingers and toes all the bad calls against the Hogs during my decades of fandom. So in case you need some reminding: “Pass interference my ass” – occurred in Dallas and allowed SMU to pull out a late-game victory over coach Lou Holtz and the Hogs. 

Uncertain which game this particular phantom flag appeared or even what it was about, but I distinctly remember Petrino screaming at the official that night – “You look my players in the eye when you make that call!”

Can I get an amen?

Throughout Saturdaze game, it was business as usual for the boys in stripes, as they continually ruled in the favor of LSU, regardless what actually went down on the field.

One particularly violent collision in the first half saw a DB for the Tigers nearly decapitate #5 in red. Whistles blew and flags flew while the call on the field was twofold – targeting and a personal foul on #3 of the defense. Several minutes elapsed. Once play resumed, the head referee turned on his mike and lied like a dirty dog, spouting nonsense by the mouthful while picking up his bought-and-paid-for yellow flag and cramming it back into his grubby little pocket.

Alas, the only way to beat this crooked system is to score points by the boatload, rack ‘em up before they have time to cheat. This is how Mr. Football did it before and is precisely what it will take again. Fortunately, the correct man for the job is calling the plays, and all that remains is proper execution.

Let’s Go!!

 

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