Hall Closets

155

In 1996 I finally had enough of higher education, so I dropped outta graduate school and entered the working world. The Northwest Arkansas Times wanted to hire me as a sportswriter and presented a job offer that came with a whopping $14,000 a year salary that I politely declined, certain that a more lucrative opportunity would present itself.

I pondered the offer for a week and nearly inked the deal, but the following Monday the Sports Editor of NAT and my friend and mentor, Mike Vacarro, was fired after Frank Broyles took offense to his Sunday column that unflatteringly summed up the sound beating the Razorbacks suffered at the hands of the Tennessee Volunteers the day before.

Broyles called the paper’s publisher and complained about Vacarro’s verbiage, particularly the opening sentence, “Barry Lunney, Jr., spent more time on his back yesterday in Razorback Stadium than a porn queen.” Those were the final bits of Razorback prose Vacarro ever wrote. He ended up landing on his feet and has been Sports Editor for the New York Post for more than 20 years. His columns can be found on the back page of the sports section.

During this time, former Razorback golfer, Jack O’Keefe, rang me up on the landline one evening and asked if I’d be interested in becoming his full-time caddie on the Nike Tour (now the Korn Ferry Tour). We would load up in his van and travel the country, all in the name of golf. I accepted the offer without much thought.

Founded more than 30 years ago and initially named after the great Ben Hogan, this minor league tour has changed names more times than Elizabeth Taylor changed husbands, and produced more elite-level golfers than any other such organization. Ballers like Tom Lehman, David Duval, David Toms and Stewart Cink, all major champions, just to name a few. It has provided a legit avenue for upcoming players to compete against other quality professionals on a weekly basis with a chance to earn PGA Tour status along the way.

My stint in the minor league lasted two years, during which I worked 40ish Nike Tour events, a handfulla PGA events, and the 1996 and 1997 US Opens. I learned more about how to caddie professionally than I thought possible and am grateful for the time I spent down in the minors. There I found out that there is more to caddying than simply keeping the clubs clean and dry, stepping off yardages, keeping track of wind direction and speed, or reading a few putts here and there.

Thankfully, a few veteran loopers took a shine to me and taught this rookie some tried and true tricks of the trade. Most of them have passed away by now, and without their priceless advice, I would not have advanced as far as I did.

Every player and/or caddie who works in the minors for smaller purses is looking for a one-way, golden ticket to the PGA Tour. These daze there are more chances to catch lightning in a bottle than ever before. Up until recently, the ultimate goal of every golfer was to become a member of the PGA Tour, as it has traditionally offered up the stiffest competition and the most prize money. But now, it has a rival by the name of LIV Golf that is funded by uber-rich Saudi Arabians with violent tendencies and questionable morals.

Since I stepped away from the tour 23 years ago, the prize money has grown such that the PGA produces more than 100 millionaires every year. Last month I saw a PGA Tour money list and read that Scottie Scheffler’s on-course earnings this year have already exceeded $27 million. He has since captured an Olympic gold medal and is the odds-on favorite to win the Fed Ex Cup and the accompanying $25 million first prize.